I guess it's been a year and a half since the last post. Not because I haven't thought about blogging, just never got around to it. Today I have 3 chief complaints: 1) Cell phones suck; 2) Children need to sleep; and 3) People's annoying habits.
First, my cell phone all of a sudden will not vibrate AT ALL. Considering what I do, Ring and Silent aren't options. I've battled this for over a week and constantly missing phone calls and getting messages hours later is not gonna work. So we go to Verizon today and the sales girl is like, "Let me take a look." As if I'm 85 and these phone thingies stump me! Then she says, "I've tried everything and your phone won't vibrate." Well no kidding Sherlock! She says that they need to do a hard reset and if that doesn't work, then they can check to see if within warranty. I shut her down (oh if I'd have just waited for one more sentence!), and told her no to the hard reset because there was info I needed to get off my phone first. Oh did I mention, her first question was whether I was eligible for an upgrade? Look B, if I wanted a new phone, I'd have come in and said, I'm looking for a new phone. Geez.
So I come home and write down what I think I need from my phone, completely forgetting the info on my Memo App! I do the hard reset and wait for it...still no vibration. The hubby happens to get on the phone with Verizon for other reasons and I ask about my phone. Well turns out, the process is hard reset, check for warranty and then, YOU'RE SCREWED because the phone is not considered "broken" for insurance purposes. Major BS. Now I get to either, a) deal with a non-vibrating phone and reset this piece of crap up; b) go by a new phone within the next couple of days; or c) both. What a waste. An seriously, how can I trust the next phone?
Skipping to number 3. Please, please, please don't repeat what I say 5 minutes after I've said it as if it is a new and enlightened idea! If I'm pissed off, repeating me is not a good move, it also does not qualify under "I was just trying to help." If you want to help, sympathize with this phone bullcrap and move on. No fixes needed, unless you can make my phone vibrate!
Lastly, why is my child 2 months shy of being 2 and still waking up at least once a night? I mean, is it going to take me running off the road and into a coma to get some consistent sleep? He doesn't even want anything when he wakes up. I mean sometimes Binky is missing or his diaper is full (by the way, no fluids after 6 pm isn't remedying that situation AT ALL), but still! I really don't know what to do. I will pray (as always), but maybe it isn't God's will that I sleep. I don't know. I'm just tired and annoyed.
Good Night.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Saturday, September 11, 2010
18, really?
Today's delight: Girl-time with my baby sis and niece. We got nails done, hit the mall, and just overall hung out. Then came home and the munchkin and I took a 2 1/2 hour nap. That's how I roll!
Today's dilemma: So at the mall I wanted to buy a pair or two of jeans because, well, I can only fit my maternity jeans and that's just not cool. #1, they are too big and #2, the band that is supercool for a pregnancy bump is superhot without one and in 95 degree heat with retarded humidity. I get to my favorite New York & Company with CityCash in hand, ready to do some damage (to the tune of $45 *smile). I start browsing the dress pants first (since I only have 5 pair that I can comfortably wear and I teach 4 days a week) looking for a size 16 to try. NO 16'S! So I'm like, lets try on the 18 and see what we're working with. I head over to the jeans section and NO 16'S! The superawesome sales lady tells me which ones are made for curvy chicks like me and so I grab 2 different styles in, again, an 18 to see what we're working with. Superawesome sales lady says let me know how those fit and then I'll check in the back to see if we('re hiding) have any 16's.
Side note: I gained 53 pounds pregnant, have lost like 46 but it's all in weird places now and I wasn't where I was supposed to be pre-pregnant anyway. So I'm going through all this when "my" size should and shall be a 14...
Anywho, I try on these 18s and the dress pants were just way too big. They were wide-legged so it was like I had a sack on with belt loops! In the jeans, both pair fit my thighs but were too big in the waist. I asked Superawesome and my baby sis if they thought there was a point in trying the 16s and they both agreed that no because then my thighs would be screaming bloody murder. So one pair would work with the aid of a pretty belt (which I bought too) and the other had too much extra material gathering up around my hips and upper thighs.
I'm just so frustrated that my thighs are like a 16/18 at stores and my waist is a 14/16 with the sixteens not matching up. I've never been an 18! This 1 year of breastfeeding needs to come on so the rest of my weight loss can kick it up a notch. I know I'm ignoring the obvious eating better and exercising mantra, but this is me we're talking about!!!
 |
| This wasn't today, but isn't he just freakin cute for no reason! |
Side note: I gained 53 pounds pregnant, have lost like 46 but it's all in weird places now and I wasn't where I was supposed to be pre-pregnant anyway. So I'm going through all this when "my" size should and shall be a 14...
Anywho, I try on these 18s and the dress pants were just way too big. They were wide-legged so it was like I had a sack on with belt loops! In the jeans, both pair fit my thighs but were too big in the waist. I asked Superawesome and my baby sis if they thought there was a point in trying the 16s and they both agreed that no because then my thighs would be screaming bloody murder. So one pair would work with the aid of a pretty belt (which I bought too) and the other had too much extra material gathering up around my hips and upper thighs.
I'm just so frustrated that my thighs are like a 16/18 at stores and my waist is a 14/16 with the sixteens not matching up. I've never been an 18! This 1 year of breastfeeding needs to come on so the rest of my weight loss can kick it up a notch. I know I'm ignoring the obvious eating better and exercising mantra, but this is me we're talking about!!!
Friday, September 10, 2010
The News
Ok, so my delight for today: watching my son stare into my eyes and making him smile. Everyone that knows or has known me always knew I was gonna be someone's mom one day. Well that day is here and as tired as I can be or sad that the munchkin isn't sleeping...I'm loving every minute of it!
My dilemma continued from last night. So we've been back in Texas for over a year now. I haven't found a full-time job and my social life is null and void. Both things are partly due to the fact that I've either been pregnant or a new mom the whole time we've been here, but not completely...just partly. I had friends from high school that I thought I'd reconnect with but that hasn't happened at all. One friend from law school (the person who helped me meet hubby) happens to live about 15 minutes down the street...but I don't WANT to kick it with her. She and I get along well, etc. but I don't want to go shopping with her, or get my nails done with her or whatever. I miss my Boo in SD.
I started teaching in January and that is pretty awesome! I've always been a bit of a teacher, but now that is my job. Of course it's only part time and Lord knows they don't pay you for all the things you have to do! I've made one friend at the job and we were pregnant together and our sons are 5 days apart. She lives near the school though and I commute from 25 miles away so she's a great work friend.
My best friend and his wife (also my really good friend) visited from SD at the end of July. After they left, the hubby sat me down and said he thought I might have been depressed but now he's sure of it. He said he finally saw ME again when our friends were visiting and he wanted me to have that again. I have such a great network of friends in SD that he knows I need to be back with them.
Also, I still remain really close to my old boss and my best friend still works there and keeps me posted on all things from the office. So hubby says to find out about getting my job back cuz he wants to go back to SD. After much praying and budget-reviewing, I have to agree that this might be the best course of action. If I can get my job back, we'd be much better off financially. I'm all about saving with this munchkin.
So I break the news to Momma last Sunday. She immediately goes on the defense, "What makes you think you can get your job back? I thought it was really expensive there? Ya'll will be so far away!" After responding to the first two questions, my third response was basically, what difference would that make. The frequency with which they visit now with me only a little over an hour away seems like they have to plan a month in advance and buy two plane tickets, rent a car and reserve a hotel! I didn't say that part, but for real!
She got all quiet and when we pulled into my garage I looked back and she was crying. She then immediately tells Dad she's ready to go and they are gone within 3 minutes flat! I'm like, oh you're so upset that we might be leaving in the future but you bail on another chance to hang out with your grandson!
I feel like I've beat a dead horse on that now. Good. That means it's out. The bottom line is we may be moving next month or next year. It is all a function of me getting a full time job. We can't keep living paycheck to paycheck with a mini-me in the house now.
Will I miss my mom and my sister, you ask. Of course I will. 2 points on that issue.
1: When I lived in SD and missed my mom and Isha I was ok. Living here and missing my Boo and best friend and others, I've been depressed and not ok.
2: In SD, I know that I'll still get to see Isha. I'll blog about our relationship one day, but suffice it to say that from the day she was born we were attached at the hip. If I have another child, or adopt one, I will pray that God makes them as close as she and I are, even through the drama.
On that note, the munchkin is asleep and the hubby is finally having some man-time. I'm going to bed. Holla!
My dilemma continued from last night. So we've been back in Texas for over a year now. I haven't found a full-time job and my social life is null and void. Both things are partly due to the fact that I've either been pregnant or a new mom the whole time we've been here, but not completely...just partly. I had friends from high school that I thought I'd reconnect with but that hasn't happened at all. One friend from law school (the person who helped me meet hubby) happens to live about 15 minutes down the street...but I don't WANT to kick it with her. She and I get along well, etc. but I don't want to go shopping with her, or get my nails done with her or whatever. I miss my Boo in SD.
I started teaching in January and that is pretty awesome! I've always been a bit of a teacher, but now that is my job. Of course it's only part time and Lord knows they don't pay you for all the things you have to do! I've made one friend at the job and we were pregnant together and our sons are 5 days apart. She lives near the school though and I commute from 25 miles away so she's a great work friend.
My best friend and his wife (also my really good friend) visited from SD at the end of July. After they left, the hubby sat me down and said he thought I might have been depressed but now he's sure of it. He said he finally saw ME again when our friends were visiting and he wanted me to have that again. I have such a great network of friends in SD that he knows I need to be back with them.
Also, I still remain really close to my old boss and my best friend still works there and keeps me posted on all things from the office. So hubby says to find out about getting my job back cuz he wants to go back to SD. After much praying and budget-reviewing, I have to agree that this might be the best course of action. If I can get my job back, we'd be much better off financially. I'm all about saving with this munchkin.
So I break the news to Momma last Sunday. She immediately goes on the defense, "What makes you think you can get your job back? I thought it was really expensive there? Ya'll will be so far away!" After responding to the first two questions, my third response was basically, what difference would that make. The frequency with which they visit now with me only a little over an hour away seems like they have to plan a month in advance and buy two plane tickets, rent a car and reserve a hotel! I didn't say that part, but for real!
She got all quiet and when we pulled into my garage I looked back and she was crying. She then immediately tells Dad she's ready to go and they are gone within 3 minutes flat! I'm like, oh you're so upset that we might be leaving in the future but you bail on another chance to hang out with your grandson!
I feel like I've beat a dead horse on that now. Good. That means it's out. The bottom line is we may be moving next month or next year. It is all a function of me getting a full time job. We can't keep living paycheck to paycheck with a mini-me in the house now.
Will I miss my mom and my sister, you ask. Of course I will. 2 points on that issue.
1: When I lived in SD and missed my mom and Isha I was ok. Living here and missing my Boo and best friend and others, I've been depressed and not ok.
2: In SD, I know that I'll still get to see Isha. I'll blog about our relationship one day, but suffice it to say that from the day she was born we were attached at the hip. If I have another child, or adopt one, I will pray that God makes them as close as she and I are, even through the drama.
On that note, the munchkin is asleep and the hubby is finally having some man-time. I'm going to bed. Holla!
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Feels taken for granted!
Ok, so here I've begun my first blog. It's I guess an online diary that I won't mind people using against me at some point later in my life...What I intend to do is describe at least 1 thing I'm delighted about and 1 thing that has puzzled me or given me pause for the day.
Delight: Junior has learned to roll and is doing it from the "tripod" sitting position! This made my day. Then, after his bath, I put my hands out to pick him up and he reached for me!!! Two milestones in one night. This certainly made up for me not getting home until 7:50 this evening.
Dilemma: Oh where do I begin? It's 5 til 11 so I know I won't get this all out tonight but I have to start the cleanse. In 2006, I moved back to San Diego with the full intention of returning "home" to Texas. After all, my mom and baby sister are here. So 3 years later, super happily married, the hubby gets a nice job and we move to Arlington to be closer to my mom and stepdad (Dad) and my baby sister, Isha. Mind you, I had to quit my super-well paying full-time job.
I find out 1 month before the move that Isha will be moving 2 1/2 hours away because her current spouse was being stationed at Fort Hood. No biggie, with gas money, I know I'll see Isha. Momma starts talking about how we'll get to spend all this time together and we'll do tons of girl stuff. We get all moved in and guess what? We're pregnant! Momma says she's so glad I'm close and she's gonna come see me all the time. She can't wait til the munchkin gets here so she can spoil him rotten. Come beginning of this year she starts talking about staying with us for a week when Junior is born and coming to visit all the time so she can watch her grandson grow. I am ecstatic about this and tell anyone who will listen about all the things my Momma and I are gonna do when my son gets here.
Fast forward to the first week of April. Junior was due in May. Momma starts backtracking. Oh, she's not gonna stay with us a week because she wants the hubby and I to have time to bond with Junior. Um...are you freaking kidding me right now? You are my Mommy for God's sake! You HAVE to be there to help me!!!! Oh well, you have your hubby so I know you'll be ok, she says. And so it begins. Somehow, because I have a happy and stable relationship I deserve less from her. Bull-pucky.
Then April 17th rolls around. Dad has had a couple of relatives die up in East St. Louis (1 really old, the other just regular old). He's going to the funeral the following weekend and plans to leave on April 21st. Momma and Dad come to visit that weekend and Momma gets down on the floor, grabs my super swollen tummy and says, "Oh God he's dropped! You are having him soon." I'm not getting my hopes up at this point because I'd been having so many freaking Braxton Hicks contractions, I had decided my child was just gonna grow up inside my womb!
Now considering her statement, I'm like, are you sure you wanna go so far away Mommy? She's reluctant, but has to be there for her husband she says. I GUESS! So, I try to reassure her (that's who I used to be, the make-you-feel-better-even-though-you-SHOULD-feel-like-crap person) that Junior will surely wait for their return on Sunday. So they hit the road on Wednesday afternoon and they drive about 8 hours. Of course my water breaks in the wee hours of Thursday morning.
Once the nurse has confirmed that I didn't just start peeing on myself, I called to let Mommy know it was time. We chat for a little bit about my water breaking, etc. and then she says something like, "Well I'm glad you have your hubby there. Isha should be able to make it too right?" I'm a very analytical person, so I picked up on what she was getting at right away. I burst into tears, sobbing really, because I wanted my mommy there.
She gives some load of crap to hubby about how it will be hard on Dad to turn around. Are you freakin kidding me? It would be harder to turn around than to drive almost the same distance the next morning to greet the dead people? I mean, they aren't getting any deader, but your grandchild is making his debut at any given moment (or hour as it was). So then it was, I'm gonna have your Dad bring us by the house when we get back in town on Sunday. Nevermind Junior was already 3 days old and already looked different than his birthday by then.
So Sunday rolls around and Momma had been hinting that Dad didn't want to have to drive all the way to our place (an extra 1 1/2 hours) after all that traveling. In my mind, I'm like, he'll surely get over that to meet his new grandson. Yeah, not so much! On Sunday, Momma says the traveling has been too much on Dad so they're not gonna make it. And oh, by the way, her students had testing that week (that she couldn't help them with so why did she need to be there) so she wouldn't be able to take off to come see Junior.
I'm like, this is not happening. This is unreal! So the first time she sees my child is when he is 8 DAYS OLD! Unacceptable. Then Dad dropped her off and picked her up on Sunday after church. All the while, Momma is talking about how much she's gonna come down to visit because she wants Junior to be as close to her as I am to my Granny. Well, Momma being the overachiever and under-thinking-things-through person she is doesn't consider how Dad conveniently scheduled his hip surgery for the first Monday Momma was out for the summer, she adds to this flying my grandparents in for 2 weeks, keeping Isha's kids for 1 week of that AND the fact that the world revolves around whatever is going on at my Dad's church at that moment. So she's been to my house 5 times since Junior was 8 days old...no, seriously.
I, still trying to be the people-pleaser, traipse my infant son back and forth to my mom's house where he didn't sleep well and was constantly being over-stimulated, trying to make sure Momma saw him and Granny and Papa saw him. When the g-parents left, I explained to Momma and Dad we wouldn't be back up there for a while because Junior has to get into a routine in a familiar place. I guess she thought I was joking.
So here's the deal: Isha and I have had some resentment towards Dad since he came on board, not because of the standard step-parent issues (well not just because of that for Isha), but because Momma completely lost her voice when they got together. Even before he was a Pastor, I guess she was so worried he'd cheat, she never wanted to leave him alone. So if he didn't want to do it, she wasn't going anywhere. Mind you, he is a total homebody and unemotional being. So while she's saying she wants to come see Junior, he can't see what the big deal is because we'll be here. She starts falling into that rut of, well if something happens I can get to her because she's just 1 1/2 hours away...no longer a plane ride. Um, don't take me for granted!
Even this past Labor Day weekend, she hadn't seen Junior in over 3 weeks but her plans were to go see her cousin first. Well Dad was like, that's enough driving then because the 1 1/2 hours is so far away. She had to pitch a fit to come see Junior! Now what kind of relationship do ya'll have that you have to tell him you want to go see your grandson. Are you kidding me?
So I had to break the news to her. She didn't take it well.
To be continued...
Delight: Junior has learned to roll and is doing it from the "tripod" sitting position! This made my day. Then, after his bath, I put my hands out to pick him up and he reached for me!!! Two milestones in one night. This certainly made up for me not getting home until 7:50 this evening.
Dilemma: Oh where do I begin? It's 5 til 11 so I know I won't get this all out tonight but I have to start the cleanse. In 2006, I moved back to San Diego with the full intention of returning "home" to Texas. After all, my mom and baby sister are here. So 3 years later, super happily married, the hubby gets a nice job and we move to Arlington to be closer to my mom and stepdad (Dad) and my baby sister, Isha. Mind you, I had to quit my super-well paying full-time job.
I find out 1 month before the move that Isha will be moving 2 1/2 hours away because her current spouse was being stationed at Fort Hood. No biggie, with gas money, I know I'll see Isha. Momma starts talking about how we'll get to spend all this time together and we'll do tons of girl stuff. We get all moved in and guess what? We're pregnant! Momma says she's so glad I'm close and she's gonna come see me all the time. She can't wait til the munchkin gets here so she can spoil him rotten. Come beginning of this year she starts talking about staying with us for a week when Junior is born and coming to visit all the time so she can watch her grandson grow. I am ecstatic about this and tell anyone who will listen about all the things my Momma and I are gonna do when my son gets here.
Fast forward to the first week of April. Junior was due in May. Momma starts backtracking. Oh, she's not gonna stay with us a week because she wants the hubby and I to have time to bond with Junior. Um...are you freaking kidding me right now? You are my Mommy for God's sake! You HAVE to be there to help me!!!! Oh well, you have your hubby so I know you'll be ok, she says. And so it begins. Somehow, because I have a happy and stable relationship I deserve less from her. Bull-pucky.
Then April 17th rolls around. Dad has had a couple of relatives die up in East St. Louis (1 really old, the other just regular old). He's going to the funeral the following weekend and plans to leave on April 21st. Momma and Dad come to visit that weekend and Momma gets down on the floor, grabs my super swollen tummy and says, "Oh God he's dropped! You are having him soon." I'm not getting my hopes up at this point because I'd been having so many freaking Braxton Hicks contractions, I had decided my child was just gonna grow up inside my womb!
Now considering her statement, I'm like, are you sure you wanna go so far away Mommy? She's reluctant, but has to be there for her husband she says. I GUESS! So, I try to reassure her (that's who I used to be, the make-you-feel-better-even-though-you-SHOULD-feel-like-crap person) that Junior will surely wait for their return on Sunday. So they hit the road on Wednesday afternoon and they drive about 8 hours. Of course my water breaks in the wee hours of Thursday morning.
Once the nurse has confirmed that I didn't just start peeing on myself, I called to let Mommy know it was time. We chat for a little bit about my water breaking, etc. and then she says something like, "Well I'm glad you have your hubby there. Isha should be able to make it too right?" I'm a very analytical person, so I picked up on what she was getting at right away. I burst into tears, sobbing really, because I wanted my mommy there.
She gives some load of crap to hubby about how it will be hard on Dad to turn around. Are you freakin kidding me? It would be harder to turn around than to drive almost the same distance the next morning to greet the dead people? I mean, they aren't getting any deader, but your grandchild is making his debut at any given moment (or hour as it was). So then it was, I'm gonna have your Dad bring us by the house when we get back in town on Sunday. Nevermind Junior was already 3 days old and already looked different than his birthday by then.
So Sunday rolls around and Momma had been hinting that Dad didn't want to have to drive all the way to our place (an extra 1 1/2 hours) after all that traveling. In my mind, I'm like, he'll surely get over that to meet his new grandson. Yeah, not so much! On Sunday, Momma says the traveling has been too much on Dad so they're not gonna make it. And oh, by the way, her students had testing that week (that she couldn't help them with so why did she need to be there) so she wouldn't be able to take off to come see Junior.
I'm like, this is not happening. This is unreal! So the first time she sees my child is when he is 8 DAYS OLD! Unacceptable. Then Dad dropped her off and picked her up on Sunday after church. All the while, Momma is talking about how much she's gonna come down to visit because she wants Junior to be as close to her as I am to my Granny. Well, Momma being the overachiever and under-thinking-things-through person she is doesn't consider how Dad conveniently scheduled his hip surgery for the first Monday Momma was out for the summer, she adds to this flying my grandparents in for 2 weeks, keeping Isha's kids for 1 week of that AND the fact that the world revolves around whatever is going on at my Dad's church at that moment. So she's been to my house 5 times since Junior was 8 days old...no, seriously.
I, still trying to be the people-pleaser, traipse my infant son back and forth to my mom's house where he didn't sleep well and was constantly being over-stimulated, trying to make sure Momma saw him and Granny and Papa saw him. When the g-parents left, I explained to Momma and Dad we wouldn't be back up there for a while because Junior has to get into a routine in a familiar place. I guess she thought I was joking.
So here's the deal: Isha and I have had some resentment towards Dad since he came on board, not because of the standard step-parent issues (well not just because of that for Isha), but because Momma completely lost her voice when they got together. Even before he was a Pastor, I guess she was so worried he'd cheat, she never wanted to leave him alone. So if he didn't want to do it, she wasn't going anywhere. Mind you, he is a total homebody and unemotional being. So while she's saying she wants to come see Junior, he can't see what the big deal is because we'll be here. She starts falling into that rut of, well if something happens I can get to her because she's just 1 1/2 hours away...no longer a plane ride. Um, don't take me for granted!
Even this past Labor Day weekend, she hadn't seen Junior in over 3 weeks but her plans were to go see her cousin first. Well Dad was like, that's enough driving then because the 1 1/2 hours is so far away. She had to pitch a fit to come see Junior! Now what kind of relationship do ya'll have that you have to tell him you want to go see your grandson. Are you kidding me?
So I had to break the news to her. She didn't take it well.
To be continued...
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